This time last year I was in unfathomable state of worry and disarray. Among other things, I was in the process of editing and reediting Brown Study…
Being rather new to the craft of writing an album (my first) so naturally I was excited, and terrified! “Will people get it? Will it be received well? But what if they love it and I can’t perform up to it next time? ” And “..But my hooks ain't that strong and I cant really perform any of the songs on it” and blah blah blah. I was drowning myself in doubt, and then came “Understanding”.
While writing that particular song, I was coming into a lot of different phases in my relationships and with myself when I came to realize something. It was the point I allowed to slip my mind even as Apollo assured me the album was dope, and friends and family reminded me what I was doing this for and kept me honest and grounded. Point being this is my platform to tell my story. However it reveals itself people will either relate, hate it, love it, rock to it or disregard it. But it’s still my story.
This is not a popularity contest. It is a test of your resilience and allegiance to your truth. Do you make music so people say its dope or do you want to connect? I Realize I want to connect on the realest, rawest level. God knows to be able to sustain myself financially from it is the ultimate goal, but that’s bonus. It is surely not the basis. Brown Study challenged me, gave me space to explore and grow. It game me exactly what I needed and showed me that honest music is the music I will make for the rest of my life. A record is nothing if it ain’t touchin, word to KT!
“And you ain't even gotta understand that”
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